2012 reflections Part 1

Its 3.07am, 1st Jan 2013 as I begin this entry of my recollection of 2012. I have been procastinating this for the past 5 hours or so. In between were fireworks, new year greetings (&birthday wishes to K) and a chat with J on whatsapp, trying to log into my blog after abt a year and reading past entries.It's funny how I am unable to recall some of those mentioned incidents that I felt so strongly back then.

This blog is like a secret haven to the inner me. If I was able to transfer all my self- thoughts and reflections that sprouts up on every day to be added in here, the blog would be consistently adding new entries. So my point of this will be 2012 and let's not digress. :))

Beginning of 2012 marked the last semester in NUS as an undergraduate. Plus this was the sem that I just needed to do 4 modules thanks to my special semester during my Year 1 break. it was to be 3 core modules and an elective. Modules taken: Human Pharmacology (P), Human Physiology: hormones and health (H), neurobiology (N) and Arabic 1 (A). Well, these were not my initial combination though. 2012 came in the form of headache and stress just in the first few weeks it started. Human Pharm was not in the list earlier. What was? I recall it to be some molecular basis of diseases (M). Drugs and society (D) to replace Arabic. For simplicity, I'm gonna give the modules letters to represent them.

With H, N, M and D, I was all set for free days and possible free days where I could simply watch webcasts from home. But that satisfaction didnt last long. It came as a shock when M scared me with a lecture presentation of a project topic. Our lab sessions scared me further and I cant recall further than that.. But after that 1st lab session, 2/3 of my friends decided to drop the module to switch to another. I didnt do so with them cos I had module clashes which I had to settle first. And I decided to try the module despite my friends calling it quits. But the next lecture? Was content overload. that was it. I had to drop the module. It was the 2nd week of school I think with CNY round the corner.. after deciding what I needed to change to fit my timetable, i went back the 3rd week to get it all done. Bleh. I had to see the prof to join the module. I did so cos it was my last semester - desperate max. But he refused flatly.

That's when even desperate measures kicked in and I looked for any core module that fitted my timetable and P was good. CORS administrator called me up after receiving my appeals and advised me to look the lecturer straight and email him so that he can make necessary adding. P lecturer was Dawe. He was really nice in replying me..unlike 2 others. So yes, so I got his approval to do this on condition that I drop D. Unfortunately P clashes with D. There you go. Drop D and find A, completing my language goals until the very last semester. So yea, these are my 4 modules after much stress. I should have known that that was just the beginning.

All of us grow up in different environments and the individual each of us become is strongly related to the former. Whether this is scientifically proven or not, I really don't know but I seem to have drawn the same conclusion through various walking examples in my life. From the kind of lifestyles we lead, to the things we do, what we eat and even how we think and behave, all these has got to do with our childhood and the environment, really. 

And that, includes siblings living under the same roof eating the same food and brought up by the same parents. It takes no genius to derive at that conclusion. In my family of six, the 4 children exhibit different kinds of mindset and behavior some of which I think I can correlate with childhood and the respective environment we all grew up in. The most prominent example I can think of is the "money-wasting/spending" behavior! 

I'm like the most stingiest of them all I think! hahaha!! I am a big time scrooge concerning myself and others. I sometimes do feel generous and spend about 20 to 30 bucks on people really close to me. And the person who usually benefits from my generosity is usually my brother. Where I am concerned, I am a big time CHEAPO! I buy $10 dollar shirts, shoes, bags and anything dirt cheap. To an extent that when I ask people at home to guess the price of what I bought during shopping that day, the guesses usually range from $5 to $10. To them, I'd never get anything more expensive than that. What have I got to say to that to back me up? 

Well, though I can't remember the exact conditions and environment I grew up in my childhood (meaning my primary school times), I remember being plagued with family quarrels over financial issues. I remember it to be quite serious type not sure if loansharks were involved due to his gamblings habits that he picked up in his workplace. Of all things right? -.-'' So I was by default had had an inner alarm being manufactured inside of me telling me that money is most precious. Saving was really the choice. Don't know if I was encouraged to save or what, but it sure became part of my life when I saved whatever I could from whatever I bought and I truly saw nothing disgraceful about me despite disgusted reactions from family. Please understand my intentions of wanting to show that all of us are different, different in our own homes.